Sunday, March 18, 2007

Hope for Online Daters

Can you really find romance online? What is the difference between those who find it and those who don't?

First of all, you can find romance, dating partners, and even real relationships online. It happened to me and there are several other people here on writing up that have had success with it. I'm getting married in August and celebrated 1 year of being with my fiance on Friday.
But what is the difference between people who really do meet and build relationships with people online. Is there a specific time line that you should chat before you meet? Do you have to be good looking? What's the deal?

I think the first thing you have to do is be honest. Not just in your ad, but be honest with yourself. What are you looking for? A date? A one night stand? Or a relationship? Knowing those things will affect how you screen potential partners.
Of course, be honest with your ad. If you have intentions of meeting someone, don't try to make yourself seem more attractive than you are. They'll find out so tell the truth. But play up your good qualities. If you have great eyes, then say so or better yet, show it. A picture that focuses on someone's eyes can be very appealing. Eyes are intimate and people believe them to be revealing. In fact, that is what attracted me to my fiances picture. His eyes seemed gentle and honest and I really liked that. If you have an outstanding quality tell them. But don't just say, "I have a great sense of humor." Show them. Make your ad funny or tell a funny story.

The more information you supply on your ad, the better the chances of meeting someone that is attracted to the type of person you are. If you have 5 lines that give only your basic stats there's not much there for them to work with is there? Most people won't take a chance even chatting online with someone they know absolutely nothing about. You don't have to reveal anything over personal but sharing a story or giving some details about how you live your life or your ethics or what your friendships are like can be very revealing.

Online dating can work but only if you want it to. You need to be patient and realize that the first few people you chat with and possibly even the first few people you meet are not going to be "the one". Listen to your instincts. Have fun. And play safe.

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